To be ikhlash is completely hard

I just learned how someone can really be so annoying that whether i take action or just keep silent the effect will b the same.  Even though i didn't do anything to her,  not a thing.  The more i try to fix things, the worse the effect i receive. 

Honestly, i feel relieved starting she stopped calling me at nights to vent all she had in her heart and head, starting the day she managed her account setting so i can't see her account activities.  Well,  that sounds rude.  I know.  That's why i have been keeping it in my head all this time.  But now i really feel like saying it out loud.

I thought being away from her is enough to make my life (and her life, maybe) peaceful. I thought (when I was her friend)  i was annoyed because i was involved in her problems. She made me involved in her problems.  I thought by deciding to let her deal with her own problems i would not invite troubles. 

I still greet her.  I still treat her the way i deal with other people.  No matter how she has been treating me. 

I just never thought that after being distant for long she still involves me.  She thinks everything in this world is about her, including things i do.  And she can easily interpret things i do the way she likes and talk about it behind my back.

Somehow i know that all this time she is still nosy about what i'm going through. But i don't give a damn.  If she knows my problems,  my failures,  my worries,  so what? I can still bear it since i don't want to get carried away (anymore) by whatever she does.

However....

I can't do that this time.  She sells my name to people. Telling her interpretation that i have done her wrong.  And she said it behind my back. 

The worse comes when i try to fix things.

It seems that i just have to swallow this silently. 

Now,  i do pray that i can make her not exist to me, and i do pray Allah keep her away from me.  So my life can be peaceful

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