You are my friend, coz you make me laugh

I have a friend, we sometimes chat online or text each other. We can chat for hours talking about many things. He always sounds happy, excited, delighted (whatsoever) each time we converse.

Once I asked why he always sounded happy. He said, “because you make me laugh..”

As time went by, I think he started to know me better since I did share some of my life stories which I shared only with my inner circle.

I don’t know what exactly make him feel so delighted with things I said. As far as I remember, We didn’t only talk about light matters. When I shared my past stories, I guess it was completely something serious and heavy…though already past. But indeed sometimes I made fun of my own life stories. Maybe that’s the thing that made the topic light. Until our last conversation…

I have to admit that during our last conversation, I was completely not in the state of being light. Well, you know me… the NT. Actually I would rather listen to his talk than have me doing the talk coz I knew if I dominated the talk, the conversation would become so heavy…

In fact, I often paused… He could sense that I was not as usual.

Then… yes… the talk was led to a heavy topic… It was about what had been hanging in my head for quite some time. I guess he just couldn’t handle that ‘serious’ topic…

The talk was ended because my line was disconnected.

I sent offline message telling that the line was suddenly disconnected.

The next day I didn’t find him online.

Surprisingly, I later found out that he was actually online appearing offline…

I sent him message which I exactly knew he would read that moment. Instead, no reply… (including the offline message on the previous day)

I didn’t want to think much, though curious.

Several days later, I happened to have a chance to confront my curiosity. I asked him whether he read my offline messages… I also jokingly said that he didn’t want me to know that he was online that night.

To my surprise… he responded by giving me answer that I knew exactly was not true.

Then I started to wonder….

What did I say? What did I do?

Was it because during the last time we talked I didn’t make him laugh? Or what?

Lesson I learned:

Some people want to be your friend because you make them happy. They want to see only the cheerful part of you, because it will lighten their life too.

In short…

You are my friend, coz you make me laugh…

On the contrary… If you don’t… you are….NOT

Honestly… I don’t want to think that he is that kind of friend…

But if he is… I think I just need to accept that.